Well, I’m not following any particular
plan with this Wednesday series on the ‘Gnarly Questions’, the genuinely
difficult matters of Catholic theology or faith practice that puzzle or
confound many. Like so much else of this blog, it’s mainly a matter of what I’m
thinking about when I wake up in the morning, or something I read this week or
whatever.
That being said, let’s talk this time
about a word that is one of the most red flag words around, a word guaranteed
to get people’s hackles up and knives out, one way or the other. Let’s talk
about judgment.
‘Do not judge, so that you may not be
judged.’ (Matt 7: 1, Lk 6:37). These are the Lord’s own words, and we ignore
them at our peril. To be a Christian is to be non-judgmental—let’s get that
straight. ‘For with the judgment you make, you will be judged’ (Matt 7:2) – the
consequences are grave if we do not come to grips with this call and live it
out faithfully.
What does it mean, anyhow? The
problem is that many people today abuse that one saying of the Lord by taking
it out of its proper context, which is the whole of Scripture. And from that,
they interpret ‘do not judge’ as meaning that we cannot advance any sort of
moral norm, make any kind of claim as to the good and evil of specific human
acts. The whole thing collapses into a sort of fuzzy relativism in which nobody
can ever say to anyone else ‘You ought not do that.’
Well, that is silly. The moral law has
been given to us as a gift to make our lives beautiful, not as a curse to
burden and afflict us. Certain actions are morally wrong simply because, and
only because, they harm us, harm particularly the one who does them. A specific
action is morally good because it helps the one doing it become more the person
he or she is created to become.
It
is incoherent to say that, say, ‘murdering another human being is wrong’, and
then, beholding Stanley bathed in the blood of Jim, not be able to say ‘Stanley
has done a wrong thing.’ That is not being non-judgmental; that is being an
idiot. Nor is it being non-judgmental to refuse on principle to go to Stanley
and say ‘Yo, Stan, you have done a wrong thing there, killing Jim!’ That is not
being non-judgmental; that is being a coward.
So what is non-judgment? It is the blank
refusal to say that another person is in a state of sin. People do wrong things
all the time, objectively manifestly wrong things. But whether they have
actually sinned or not depends on a host of factors that are utterly unknown to
us.
For an action to be a mortal sin, it has
to be grave matter (something serious, Ten Commandment stuff). The person also
has to have full knowledge that what they are doing is wrong. They have to be
doing it freely and without compulsion, with deliberate intent (cf Catechism
1857). These latter two conditions are known only to God, since they pertain to
the interiority of the person.
It is not a judgmental thing to say to a
person, “You know, I really don’t think you should be doing that. Did you know
that was against the moral law? It is, you know!” That is a work of mercy,
actually, provided it is done with prudence and charity. It is a judgmental
thing to say to someone, “You are a sinner – you’re going to go to Hell if you
don’t cut that out right now.”
Mind you, most of us, in our
judgmentalism, don’t actually say those things out loud. The late Fred Phelps
and his so-called ‘church’ (of ‘God Hates Fags’ notoriety) really are extreme
outliers. But for many Christians it is more a matter of the up-turned nose, the
pursed lips, the raised eyebrow, the dirty look, the cold demeanour, the sneer.
And these things, because they cannot be directly countered or corrected,
because they are matters of non-verbal and unspoken judgments, can be much more
damaging in the end.
We have to pray for, and choose, really
choose, to have a compassionate heart and a friendly disposition towards all
men and women—the ones who always get it right and do everything they’re
supposed to do (whoever those happy few may be), and the ones who struggle and
fall down and are lost in any number of immoral paths and bad choices.
We don’t know how God sees them, although
we do know He loves them enough to die for them. Perhaps we could love them
enough to stifle our criticisms and carping and unkindness?
There is much more to say about this—so often
we jump to conclusions about situations, make assumptions about what a person
is doing and what is in their hearts, and our assumptions are quite often not charitable
and are astonishingly often wildly inaccurate.
Judgment belongs to God. We are indeed to
know what is right and what is wrong—why on earth would God want us to be
ignorant of such vital matters? But to assess whether another person is in the
grace of God or is cut off from Him—this is simply not our business and we
indulge in such matters to our own immortal peril, as the Lord Himself took
pains to tell us.
Do not judge, lest you be judged.
I hear this a little differently.
ReplyDeleteMatt.7:1-5 does not teach “Love the sinner, hate the sin.” Instead, it means we are to: “Love the sinner and hate your own sin.” Thomas Merton made a similar point: “If you love peace, then hate injustice, hate tyranny, hate greed – but hate those things in yourself, not in another.” How difficult that truly is!
Sadly, much of the polarization in our church is related to a false notion of judgementalism. This belief that we are to hold up our moral superiority against those who we have judged to believe differently from ourselves. There are those who deride and even shun those whom they have judged to be morally wrong. As if judgement belonged with them and not God.
We all have to be very careful here...and pray very hard. Learn to speak more clearly for life and not against it....
Bless you.
I'm not quite sure I am following you well. It seems to me that if I really and deeply love a person, I will indeed hate the evil they do. For example, I have a near relative who has ruined his life with drug use. I love this person, and so I hate the evil of what he has done. If I did not, could I really say I loved him?
DeleteAnd the second paragraph of your comment seems to me to be more or less restating what I said in my post, so I'm not sure if you think you are disagreeing with me or what... anyhow, I do think I'm pretty careful in how I write, and I maintain what I have written here. God bless you!
I have several grandchildren who are living with and not married to their partner----and not practising their faith-And also a daughter and her husband and son, who no longer practise their faith and one fallen away son who has been away from the church for over 40 years......I pray for all of them but would like to be able to talk to them about the lifestyles they are living but I know they will not be open to hearing it from their grandma!! Should I say anything to them...I don't want any of them to die without being in a state of grace........
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